Wedding Jokes, have some fun!

Forever hold your peace ..

During the wedding ceremony, when the minister/preacher/priest comes to the part about, “If anyone has any reason why these two people should not marry, speak up now or forever hold your peace…” have this 4-to-6 year old boy running up the aisle yelling, “Daddy, daddy.”I understand from a friend who played this joke on a relative that it took almost an hour to get the wedding started again.

Short changed

A friend got married and I, being the best man, decided a humorous practical joke was in order. One of the duties of the best man is to make arrangements for pick up and return of the groom’s tux. After final fitting, rent an extra coat jacket that is either 3 or 4 sizes smaller or larger than the groom’s. Explain to the tux shop what you’re up to. Pick up the groom’s fitted coat, switch with the extra rented coat, and deliver to the groom only when it becomes time to actually get dressed. The friend of mine wore a 42 long, but the one I provided was a 38 short.  Don’t reveal that you know anything as long as possible.

Wedding lottery

A man was surprised to hear from an old school friend of his asking if he would be the best man at his soon to be held wedding. They had not seen each other for a while and he did not really know that much about the bridegroom to be, all he remembered about him from school was that he was a great practical joker. With this in mind on the day of the wedding the best man got hold of the bridegrooms lottery ticket and noted down the numbers. As he was starting his best mans speech he said that he as well as many others followed the lottery and if no-one minded he was going to read out the winning numbers which had been called a few minutes ago, everyone duly took out their tickets checking the numbers as he called them out. He could see the bridegroom becoming more and more excited as he read out the numbers until at the end, up jumped the bridegroom yelling out that he won the lottery, he was rich, he ran round showing the ticket to all. His new bride said how wonderful as they were now rich, what do you mean we, laughed the bridegroom? This is my ticket!! I am rich, besides which I have been sleeping with your sister for the last two months, so saying he grabbed the sisters hand and left never to be seen again.

Will Online Shopping Overtake Traditional Shopping?

Nowadays, almost every major retailer has a website; those that yet don’t, are certainly moving in that direction. Indeed online shopping bring us convenience, we go there, we browse, and we buy.

But for some, the traditional formula of simply setting up a web page and waiting for customers to click “buy” just does not work. For example, not many Belarusians who live in rural areas and small towns have internet access – or carry around 3G smartphones. So it seemed tricky to rely on e-commerce alone.

Online or offline?

There are places such as China, for instance, where most people go online on their mobiles as opposed to home computers – and turning them into buyers is many retailers’ ultimate goal.

Martin Gill from Forrester Research thinks that the smartphone is becoming that crucial glue destined to bind the online and the offline experiences together.

“Apps like bar code scanning, store locator, checking physical stock online via your phone – all of these features are turning your mobile into a shopping buddy or a shopping assistant,” he says.

“These technologies are compelling and quite playful ways of engaging shoppers – they make the experience interesting, they make it unique to you, trying to build an emotional connection and create a link that resonates on a personal level.”

Even such giants and pioneers of online commerce as eBay and Amazon that have never even had physical stores, have eventually joined the crowd and followed you from your living room right into your car, train or your child’s playground.

“Mobile shopping is a hugely-growing trend,” says Angus McCarey, eBay’s retail director.

“In 2010 we tripled the amount of global business that we did over the mobile, reaching $2bn (£1.2bn), and this year, we’re on track to double it – we’ll do $4bn (£2.4bn) or more.”

In the UK, considered the most rapidly-developing European market in m-commerce, during last year’s Christmas holiday season eBay had 10% of its turnover through some kind of mobile application.

And eBay is not stopping at simply dragging you onto their website via your phone.

With ever-evolving technology and consumer habits, the company has had to innovate to constantly stay ahead of the game.

For instance, book lovers in a store now have a choice of either buying the item in front of them or using a special smartphone app to find that book on eBay – for less money.

“The world of offline and online shopping is blurring through the mobile, and with scanning technologies such as Red Laser, you can check the price of a book that you’re looking at in the shop and order it really quickly online,” says Mr McCarey.

And although this technology is still mostly limited to scanning easily-catalogued products such as books and DVDs, it soon might be possible to snap a photo of that stunning but crazy pricey red dress on a mannequin in a shop’s window – and through some internet magic instantly find it far cheaper on the web.

Visit to China’s Secretive Tech Giant Huawei

It’s one of the world’s leading – and somewhat inscrutable – technology companies. Its telecom systems connect a third of the world’s mobile phones. And globally, it employs 110,000 staff – more than Cisco or Microsoft. The company is Huawei – born and bred in Shenzhen, southern China. And it epitomises today’s power of Asia.

“Our workforce is also very young – the average age is 29 – so there’s a very dynamic environment within the company.”

Here, the company houses key research-and-development units, global testing facilities, and an executive training centre. But the enthusiasm on show isn’t all down to the youth factor.

In its early days, Huawei had to fight its corner for a share of China’s mobile telecoms market.

Back then, the main orders for the lucrative urban network systems went to either state-owned companies or foreign firms. So Huawei, instead, focused on the challenging countryside.

As the company grew and expanded into foreign markets, it made a name for itself as a problem solver – listening to its potential customers’ needs or problems and designing solutions.

Huawei’s Ross Gan says the company cut its teeth on rural markets Huawei is now the world’s second-largest supplier of mobile telecom equipment, after Ericsson, serving 31 of the top 50 telecoms operators. It also boasts 55% of the global market share in 3G dongles.

Huawei attracts the cream of China’s engineers – postgraduates like Zhong Jianwei, project manager at the company’s technical compliance unit.

He discovered that working here is very different from most large Chinese companies with their typical rigid, statist, chains of command.

“Every day, I need to communicate with Huawei staff all over the world. It’s international here – global,” remarks Zhong Jianwei.

“I’ve never experienced this before.”

To achieve its growth targets, Huawei wants new experiences.

At the Shenzhen headquarters, it’s clear that huge efforts are going into video conferencing – from standard desktop or mobile use to the kind of systems used by large corporations and governments. The goal is to create near face-to face communication.

The design team is now working on reducing today’s distracting seams between the multi-screens.

“Within the next one-to-two years, we will, step-by-step, go from a narrow gap to no gap, to even 3D, ” enthuses Luo Shan, software development engineer.

“Now we’re working on the technology. We want to deliver a trusted high-level experience.”

Women’s Fashion Trend: Stripes for Summer

As the 2010 military trend winds down, this summer we turn to new influences – but that doesn’t mean the nautical shall be overlooked entirely. For those fashionisers who are nautically inclined, Summer 2011 still has something in store. Don’t think of it strictly as a nautical military trend, however. Rather, it’s the classic navy and white colour palette, worn as dominant stripes.

Note that I didn’t say bold stripes, but dominant stripes. While navy and white stripes are a must for the look (though black and white can also work in 2011), the real key to Summer’s take on nautical stripes is that they dominate the outfit. While they do so in the below look easily (though the plum Doc Martens still seem somewhat heavy), in other outfits it’s about drawing attention to the stripes above all else in the outfit.

While most looks rely on bold stripes, you’ll see that the trend is just as effective when the stripes are thin. Hence for Summer 2010 look for dominant stripes, not necessarily bold ones. Don’t think of this Summer stripes just as a clothing trend: you can work them into any part of an outfit, any accessories from hat to killer mini-dresses.

Remember that: this summer, the stripes don’t dominate, but in a crowded room the look certainly will.

Types of Men’s Suits

Men’s wardrobes cannot be complete without suits. Men’s suits are popular all over the world and have gained a lot of reputation. The suits are worn as a style statement. They signify a distinct character and professionalism. There are many different occasions that you can wear a suit in. These are available in different colors, patterns and sizes.

Most often, the first suit that is worn today is the dinner suit. This suit has emerged as an alternative to the dress coat today. This is almost the same way as the day lounge suit takes up most of the occasions. Also a dinner suit can be worn for a black tie suit. It will blend in quite well.

The second most favored suit in the world is the men’s business suit. This kind of suit is mostly favored by businessmen. It is most commonly used as a lounge suit. While going for business activities like a conference or a meeting, this type of suit is greatly favored. For such occasions, business suits are considered the most comfortable attire. In fact in some organizations, a business suit is compulsory attire.

The next type of suits in line would be the wedding suits for men. These are generally worn for occasions like wedding party etc. These suits are worn to produce elegance and grace for such occasions. These suits can be best described as a fusion of modern styles and traditional fabrics. Also alternatively, for such occasions, designer suits can also be used. These suits however, can be quite difficult to buy. As you fashion changes every year, these suits also change in style and color. The designer suits are available in different colors styles and materials.

Apart from these, there are vintage suites that are also available. These are three piece suits that consist of the jacket vest and the pants. They are made usually out if the same two materials which are wool or polyester. These are also available in different colors and patterns. The lists of men’s suits don’t end here. There are church suits, Italian suits; dress suits in fact men’s suits are available for every occasions.

If you are looking to buy a suit and don’t have much time then online suit stores will be the most beneficial for you. There are many suit stores that are online today such as Btbone that offer a variety of suits. These suits are also available in different colors. You need to enter your measurements and you will get a list of suits that are available in your size. You can further categorizes these suits for the occasion that you are looking for to narrow down your choices. You can review a few of these suits and this will help you obtain a clear picture and avoid all confusion.

What to Wear to a Wedding

So you didn’t make the bridesmaid cut — well played! Now, what the hell do you wear? We’ve pulled together your best bets for every scenario so you can blend in without being overlooked.

Nothing is more garish at a preppy noon wedding than edgy couture. Stick to pastel tea-length or eyelet dresses and peep-toe flats so you don’t poke Louboutin-size holes in that prize-winning golf course.

Finally, a wedding where cleavage is acceptable. Wear something comfy enough to take you from the wedding to the craps table to the plane — it’s gonna be a long night.

Don’t buck tradition: Pony up for a timeless, long black-and-white strapless or short-sleeve gown. Gloves optional. (But if — like us — you eat, beware: Those things are a major pain during the passed hors oeuvres.

Great Gatsby glam? Try a drop-waist frock with a feathered cloche (yes,   feathers!). Medieval madness? Eschew elf ears for a plum gown and decadent   jewels. You’ll thank us when the online photo album goes live.

The long, print maxi dress was made for exotic locales. Since you’ve spent your savings on a ticket, skip the shoes plurge and slip into metallic gladiator sandals.

Trendy Flower Girl Dresses

Flower girl dresses are designed for little girls between the ages of three and eight, mainly at weddings, however, they are not only restricted to weddings, also often worn on many other occasions like parties, receptions, communions, baptism, christening, Easter, and other special programs. This quick guide outlines trendy types of this year in the market, so you can find that perfect, adorable and cheap flower girl dress.

Princess Flower Girl Dresses

Every flower girl wants to look like a princess in their dress. They want to look and feel fancy just like the bride and bridesmaids. There are some flower girl dresses that are designed to look like princess dresses. These often have a full skirt with lots of frills, lace, beads, flowers, or ribbons. Some princess styles to look for include white flower girl dresses with a satin bodice and a double-layered full tulle skirt. These often have a ribbon wrapped around the dress above the waistline with a flower or bow. A crinoline or a hoop slip can be added under the skirt to give an even fuller look.

Pleated Flower Girl Dresses

Flower Girl Dresses with pleats may not sound typical of flower girl dresses, but they are actually very pretty, especially the longer, box-pleated flower girl dresses. Pleated flower girl dresses are not as full as the princess-type skirts, but can still be very decorative. Box-pleated skirts have wide, even pleats that run vertically down the skirt’s length and appear to spread wider apart toward the bottom of the skirt. Pleated flower girl dresses are classical in style and offer a simple, yet elegant touch to any wedding.

Gathered, Pulled, Puffed, and Scattered Flower Girl Dresses

This may sound like a messy way to describe a flower girl dress style, but it’s really a very beautiful design. With this type of dress, the skirt’s upper layer of cloth, satin, or lace is gathered at the hemline and/or at certain points throughout, and then pulled and puffed at these points. This gives a semi-wrinkled look. With scattered flowers or roses at the gathered points, this style creates a dashing look for the flower girl!

Pick-Up Flower Girl Dresses

The pick-up design is often used on a full or a-line skirt. Pieces of fabric are gathered at the hemline, allowing other parts to drape in a curve around the hemline of the skirt. This simple added touch makes any plain skirt look elegant and graceful.

Bodices and Sleeves Flower Girl Dresses

Bodices may be plain satin or decorated with lace, flowers, or pearls. The bodice might be pleated, embroidered, or feature scattered flowers or roses. There are also varying styles of necklines such as halter, sweetheart, v-neckline, scoop, or boat neckline. Flower girl dresses may be sleeveless or feature halter straps, thin spagetti straps, short or long sleeves, or puff sleeves.

Online shopping is a better way to see photos of flower girl dresses and to get an idea of what styles are available. There are many children’s boutiques or online stores like Btbone that sell kids’ wedding party dresses where you can view and purchase flower girl dresses. These shops may also offer other products such as boys’ suits, christening dresses, or girls’ communion dresses. Having just the right flower girl and flower girl dress will add that special touch to your wedding!

Mermaid One Shoulder Bridal Dress

One shoulder wedding dresses usually help to make wearers’ silhouettes slender. This time, a slim figure is perfectly flattered by the blend between one shoulder and mermaid, charming so many people on the first glimpse.

Different with traditional asymmetrical wedding dresses, the shoulder strap is an additional element for this wedding gown. It crosses the right shoulder and can be tied as a delicate bowknot on your waist. It’ s long enough to be draping on the side of the wedding dress. Applique on the floor-length dress, ruffle and sweetheart pattern on the bodice are both significant ingredients to make this girl’ s appearance aristocratic enough. If you plan to generate a formal nuptial, you really should not neglect such a queen-like wedding gown.

One shoulder modern wedding dresses carry magic appeal for modern girls. They frequently appear on both magnificent church weddings and romantic beach nuptials. Allure on them is not second to what contemporary brides detect from formal black dresses or temperately sexy off the shoulder wedding dresses.

Even though fashion trends vary in a rather fast rhythm, asymmetrical wedding gowns seem like continuing to be influential for lots of girls in today’ s era. In order to slim your figure and enhance your charm, why not pick out a style from these safe bets?

Ask Btbone.com for advice in areas of wedding dresses, costumes, shoes and accessories. We write numerous articles providing information for the customers.

Gothic Lolita Dress

Gothic lolita dress is a kind of costume of a Janpanese teen or young adult who dress in amazingly elaborate Gothic appearance. It is usual for women to walk the streets of Tokyo and Osaka and fill Yoyogi Park and Harajuku on weekends. In the place, they pose for tourist’s pictures and sit around with pretty. They are often beautiful, glamorous, doll-like manifestations of their favorite Visual Rock stars.

This subculture’s physical look began around the fall of 1999 as a sort of French Maid meets Alice in Wonderland style and has expanded gradually to encompass many nuances in a Victorian Gothic look. Make no mistake – these women want nothing to do with our Western Gothic ways. They do not listen to our music and they are not Gothic in the American and European sense. (Don’t worry there are Japanese Goths but they are just not a prominent mainstream subculture.) The Lolita’s music of choice, for the visuals and sometimes the sounds, is a version of Heavy Metal with gothic hints. Visual Kei or Visual Rock is a form of Japanese pop rock music where the musicians dress in elaborate costumes. Anything from a twinge of glam to full blown female impersonation can be called Visual Rock. These artists feel they must dress up to act out their music. X Japan seems to be the band that started it all. Visual Rock is a blanket term that encompasses J-Rock or J-Pop. J-Rock is not usually the music Gothic Lolita’s listen to. J-Rock is very influenced by the American Heavy Metal Glam bands like Motley Crue. Gothic Lolitas want to emulate the Visual bands that dress the most feminine. There are male fans of all forms of V-Rock but men do not participate in the gothic lolita culture. Male fans are uninterested in looking feminine and it is the women who want to look like their idols. Dir en Grey and Malice Mizer are the most popular and authentic of the bands the Gothic Lolitas follow. Malice Mizer’s (pronounced Marisu Miseru) guitar player, Mana, is commonly given credit for starting the Gothic Lolita look. Sometimes he wears a kind of modern Victorian mourning style with large elaborate dresses, big hair, and dark make-up. The amount of time, energy, and money all these people put into their appearance is truly amazing and inspiring at the same time.

Gothic lolita dress is featured with the combination of black and white color. It often convey formal occasion. It is suitable for elegant, and generous girls.

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Vanessa Minnillo’s “Very Emotional” Wedding Dress Decision

When Vanessa Minnillo ventured out for that wedding dress shopping trip every  girl dreams of, it didn’t go as expected. Minnillo, whose birth mother hasn’t been in her life for more than 20 years, struggled with not having her mom there with her on that special day. “Normally this is something you do with your mother, and my birth mother hasn’t been in my life since I was 9,” she explains emotionally. “I have been okay with that up until now but for some unexplained reason, it really overtook me. I felt lost, confused and sad. It was very emotional.”With her matron of honor, friend Jennifer Birmingham-Lee, by her side, Minnillo worked with Monique Lhuillier to try and find the perfect dress. “This was the hardest decision in the whole wedding planning … probably because I didn’t have the support of Nick [Lachey],”Minnillo says. “We decided everything together, even his [Dolce & Gabbana] tux. For the first time, I felt a little bit alone.” To gain some clarity, the bride-to-be decided to ask for her groom’s opinion. “I said, ‘What do you want to see me in when you marry me and I become Mrs. Lachey?'” she recalls. And much to Minnillo’s surprise, Lachey didn’t give a generic male response and instead, was eager to say, “Something traditional with a little modern flair.” So following their chat, Minnillo headed back to Lhuillier’s Los Angeles boutique … and the rest is history. “Literally the next day I went to Monique and tried on my three dresses for the zillionth time. As soon as I put it on, I knew this was it.”